Dead Horses


Subject: Acquisition Reform

Dakota tribal wisdom says that when you discover you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount AND BURY THE HORSE.

However, in government we often try other strategies with dead horses, including the following.

1. Buy a stronger whip.

2. Changing riders.

2a. Changing stables.

3. Saying things like, This is the way we have always ridden this horse.

4. Appointing a committee to study the horse.

5. Arranging to visit other sites to see how they ride dead horses.

6. Increasing the standards to ride dead horses.

7. Appointing a tiger team to revive the dead horse.

8. Creating a training session to increase our riding ability.

9. Comparing the state of dead horses in today's environment.

10. Pass legislation declaring that this horse is not dead.

11. Blaming the horses parents.

12. Harnessing several dead horses together for increased speed.

13. Declaring that no horse is too dead to beat.

14. Providing additional funding to increase the horses performance.

15. Do a CA study to see if the contractors can ride it cheaper.

16. Procure a COTS dead horse.

17. Declare a horse is better, faster and cheaper dead.

18. Form a quality circle to find uses for dead horses.

19. Revise the performance requirements for horses.

20. Say this horse was procured with cost as an independent variable.

21. BRAC the stable it came from.

22. Submit a product improvement program to decrease the smell of dead horses.

23. Ignore the smell and issue requirements for all riders to wear masks.

24. Submit a suggestion showing how much money you can save by buying dead horses.

25. Submit an OSCR program showing the reduction in O & S costs for dead horses.